I have been waiting a LONG time to write this post. I've said several times in the past few weeks that there's been "stuff" going on that I haven't been able to talk about. "Health" stuff, job stuff. I've been too tired to do anything, much less blog. Well, now I can finally tell you that it's because...
Our Facebook announcement!
That's right...we're having a baby! I'm pregnant! Everyone always wants know, how did you find out? Were you trying? How have you been feeling? Yada yada.
My husband and I made the decision to stop preventing at the end of 2013. That being said, we agreed that we wanted the trying process to be fun. We didn't want to be--and hoped we wouldn't have to be--the couple that had to pay attention to my body temperature or certain hours of the day that were optimal for intimacy. We wanted it to happen, but just wanted to let it happen on its own. That said, there are certain things you need to pay attention to when trying to make baby, and so in March we decided to continue to have fun, but to pay closer attention.
At the beginning of April, it was my '"time of the month" and I was late. I'm usually pretty timely with those things, but Friday came and went and nothing. I waited through the weekend, telling Bryan that I was pretty sure I was pregnant, but we agreed to wait until Monday to take a test. One or 2 days late, after all, was not completely unheard of.
On Monday morning, I decided I didn't want to take the test before work. I felt like either way, I wanted us to be able to take in the news and react how we wanted to without having to rush off to work. I came home that night and told Bryan it was time. I went back to the bathroom and took a pregnancy test, letting it sit on the counter while I changed into my PJs. Bryan walked back in and said, "Well?" "I didn't look yet," I told him. I went into the bathroom and picked up the test. Sure enough, it was positive!
I showed the test to Bryan with tears in my eyes, and he looked at it, confused, and said, "what does this mean?" "It means we're having a baby," I told him. And with tears in his eyes, we hugged and kissed before I pulled away and said, "Holy shit."
I kind of feel like no matter if you are trying or if it's an accident, it's normal for your first words to be in the vein of "Oh shit." Unless of course you've had difficulty getting pregnant and have been trying different methods, you're completely overjoyed. And don't get me wrong. I was happy, of course, but I was just so shocked. It's one of those moments where your life literally changes in a minute. One minute you're not pregnant, the next minute you are. (I mean, not technically but you know what I mean.)
So yes, happiness is of course one of the many emotions we experienced in those first moments of learning we were going to be parents, but we (or at least I) went through a slew of others. Shock and sheer terror being two of the major ones. What did we do? Were we really ready for this? Could we afford a child? How the hell will we know what we're doing? How do I take care of myself? I'M GROWING A HUMAN?!
Bryan is the yin to my yang. As I was completely freaking out, he talked me off the ledge and assured me that we could do this. I could do this. We wanted this and we were lucky that it happened so quickly and so easily. I loved him so much in that moment.
And so that was that! We did some math and figured out that our estimated due date was December 19, 2014. (Upon that revelation, I started crying again, bemoaning the fact that I didn't want our poor child to share a birthday with Christmas. Too bad, kid.)
Taken the morning after I found out. Looking back, I was sure I already had a bump,
but compared to how I look now (still with not much bump), I'm skinny here!
The following weeks were an adjustment period, for sure, as I made doctor's appointments, learned what foods, drinks and medicines to avoid and which were safe, and adjusted to the changes happening in my body. We shared the news with my two best friends (one of whom is pregnant and due just 6 weeks before me!) and with our families over Easter weekend. I cried with every person I told for the first few weeks (emotional much?). Everyone was completely over the moon for us and so supportive.
My older sister apparently knew upon looking at me that I was pregnant, so I didn't get to tell her in a fun way. I told my niece, who is 2.5 years old, that I was pregnant and we were all in the car with my little sister on the way to her first dress fitting. We were talking about someone else being pregnant and Sloan blurted out, "Chi Chi's pregnant!" So that's how my little sister found out, haha.
We told our parents with little signs that said "Grandparents: So easy to operate, even child can do it."
My mom's said "The next best thing to having you for a mom is knowing my children will have you for a grandma."
Flash forward to now, and I'll be 14 weeks tomorrow! Second trimester already, can you believe it? I have been a lucky lady and have felt awesome my whole pregnancy. I've been tired, my boobs have been SO SORE, and I've had some bad headaches but that's about the worst of it. Some nights I get nauseous but no vomiting. I'm working out, sleeping OK for the most part. I really can't complain.
So, now that I've got this adventure going on, hopefully this blog will get a lot more colorful! I've been journaling, with an actual pen and paper, since I haven't been able to blog about it yet. But I promise, I will give you the whole truth and nothing but. My favorite pregnancy books have been the "real" ones that make you feel normal for taking a hot minute to get really excited about having baby, and that tell you that the first trimester sucks. I will be that for you.
Back with more soon, including pictures of our peanut, doctor's appointments and some bump photos!